Getting divorced can be very painful. After years together with your spouse, it can be difficult to imagine life without them. However, sometimes, breaking up is the healthier alternative to staying together if that means avoiding constant fights.
Redditor West-Dragonfly-7526 recently turned to the internet for advice after spilling the tea about how she reacted to her sister’s divorce. She shared that her sibling has a strong fixation on specific colors, which drove her relationship with her husband over the brink. Keep scrolling for the full story and an update, as well as the r/AITAH online community’s reactions.
It can be quite a challenge to live with someone who wants to control every aspect of your shared life at home
Image credits: FollowTheFlowStudio / envatoelements (not the actual photo)
A woman spilled the tea about how her sister got kicked out by her husband due to her unusual obsession with a certain aesthetic
Image credits: zamrznutitonovi / envatoelements (not the actual photo)
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Image credits: msvyatkovska / envatoelements (not the actual photo)
Image credits: West-Dragonfly-7526
Perfectionists often set unrealistic standards and are very critical of others
Forbes notes that 31% of couples ended their marriages because they were incompatible and had irreconcilable differences.
However, another common reason for divorce was infidelity. 34% of marriages ended because someone had an affair.
Other common reasons for divorce include a lack of intimacy, a lack of family support, too much conflict, and financial stress.
According to Verywell Mind, perfectionists tend to be highly critical individuals who have an all-or-nothing mindset.
Usually, they have unrealistically high standards, tend to focus only on results, and feel bad when they don’t meet their goals. In other words, they have a deep fear of failure and very serious self-esteem issues.
If you live with other people, it’s inevitable that you’ll have to look for compromises in your daily life
Objectively, there’s nothing wrong with enjoying a specific aesthetic or being passionate about fashion and interior design. However, the problem arises when this passion turns into an obsession.
It’s entirely understandable if someone wants to keep their home neat, tidy, and fit a general style of design. But ‘perfection’ is unattainable when you share your home with other people.
You can’t expect to have a home that 100% fits your aesthetic when you don’t live alone. The odds are, your partner will have their own vision for your shared home. You’ll inevitably have to compromise.
Moreover, if you have children, it’s inevitable that your home will get messy at times. Not only that but you can’t expect all of your kids’ clothes to fit only your preferred colors. That level of control is unhealthy.
Throwing out things—including hand-knit sweaters—because they don’t match a certain color scheme shows that the person prioritizes appearances over sentimentalism and compassion.
It’s best to talk to a therapist instead of ignoring the issue that has had such a deeply negative impact on your life
It’s impossible to know the root of the issue without a professional consultation with a mental health specialist.
Talking with a certified therapist would be a great idea. It would help the person (and their loved ones) understand what’s happening and where the obsession with certain colors springs from.
It might indicate that the person is a perfectionist. Or that they try to deal with the overwhelming stress of life by focusing on interior design details. Alternatively, they might have obsessive-compulsive disorder or be on the autism spectrum. Again, it’s impossible to tell without knowing the person and getting an official diagnosis.
Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. If anything, becoming self-aware, recognizing that you have serious issues that affect your life in a negative, and taking the steps to solve them is a sign of strength.
What’s your take on the situation with the internet user’s sister? What would you do if your partner suddenly started trying to control every detail in your home? What do you think could potentially save the woman’s marriage? If you have a moment, share your thoughts in the comments.
As the story went viral, the author shared some more context about her family in the comments of her post
A lot of people thought that the woman did nothing wrong for calling out her sister
However, a few internet users thought that the author could have handled the entire situation better
The post “AITA For Telling My Sister ‘I Told You So’ After She Announced Her Husband’s Divorcing Her?” first appeared on Bored Panda.