Childhood can be a very strange time, since one has all their senses but not a good frame of reference for things. The result is that new settings, be it a foreign country or just visiting a friend’s home for the first time. So it shouldn’t be surprising that upon getting to adulthood, people often see their entire childhood in a new light.
Someone asked “What’s a “normal” childhood experience you later realized was actually traumatic?” and people shared their experiences. Be warned, some of these get a bit dark. So get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites and be sure to add your own thoughts in the comments below.
Read More: 40 Things People Experienced As Kids And Only Later Realized Were Deeply Unsettling
#1
Never receiving any hugs from my parents. Or valuable advice. Not even when I cried/was hurt physically. Comfort was quite absent, too. I only realized few years ago when I saw an 17 year old teenager leaning against his dad and telling him about his struggles about an upcoming big decision.
Never have had that level of support and comfort and it still makes my eyes water when I think about it in weak moments. .
Image credits: magischeblume
#2
The silent treatment. I still assume that someone is angry when they’re quiet. I’m 70.
Image credits: Yajahyaya
#3
“Talking back”. Turns out they just wanted me to be silent and have no opinion or feelings. My mother and stepfather used to constantly say how I was mouthy and constant talked back- well yeah, how else am I supposed to communicate? Smoke signals?
Image credits: SeraphRising89
#4
Being told ‘stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about’—like, oh cool, emotional suppression unlocked at age 5.
Image credits: Best_Sherbet2727
#5
I wasn’t really allowed to complain or express frustration with my experiences because someone in my family had had it worse when they were my age.
Image credits: secomano
#6
Getting teased and/or made fun or for liking certain things as a young child.
My older sister often teased me for the tv shows i liked to watch and made fun of my drawings when i created my own pokemon for example.
Same thing in school.
I still remember every single instance in of it in detail. To this day i dont like to share my passions with people and supress strong displays if positive emotions around others.
Image credits: absedy251991
#7
Thinking that I’m inherently a mean, evil, broken person at age like….8 or 9.
When I watched inside out 2 it honestly shocked me that Riley thought she was inherently a good person lol.
Image credits: ctortan
#8
Being made fun of when you go to parent with an uncomfortable situation. I was at a sleepover and another girl wanted to “play house” by laying on top of me. I was so uncomfortable I wanted to go home and afterwards my mom made fun of me for it. Guess who never went to their mom with feelings again.
Image credits: Charming_Caramel_303
#9
Waiting for my dad to be in a good mood to ask him something.
Image credits: StraightTale9857
#10
My uncle tickling me until I cried.
Image credits: bekisuki
#11
Being told we have no where to live at the end of the month. Everything being hand-me-downs and smelling like other people, you never feel settled, like you’re in a strangers house, bed and clothes.
Poverty, real poverty in general. Don’t have kids if you can’t afford a great life for them.
Image credits: Striking-Kiwi-417
#12
Avoiding my dad when I could tell that he was angry.
Image credits: Altoid_Addict
#13
Having my hair chopped off because I wasn’t taking care of it to my mother’s standards.
I was 6, and had very long, very curly hair. Of course I struggled to take care of it!
Image credits: ellieellieoxenfree
#14
My mom yelling at me when I was hurt or sick instead of being nurturing. She has bad anxiety and doesn’t handle stressful situations well. This has lead me to crave a ton of sympathy/attention when I’m sick as an adult.
Image credits: NearlyZeroBeams
#15
I wouldn’t say I’m traumatized from it, but I realized I’m a people pleaser because my father never showed me that he was proud of me when I was younger. His attitude towards my achievements would lead me to believe they were expectations more than things to be proud of.
It was an internal conflict I struggled with throughout my teen years and into my early 20’s, but I’m glad to say I’ve been working on it since recognizing the root cause of my people pleasing.
Image credits: GlitteringLook3033
#16
My mom would go into these insane cleaning frenzies where you got yelled at if you didn’t suddenly start cleaning along with her. As soon as you heard the vacuum, you knew she was gonna be in a terrible mood. Day ruined for sure.
Whenever my partner vacuums, I get really upset no matter how many times she tells me she’s not mad.
Image credits: im_dylan_it
#17
Falling asleep under my bed instead of in it because it was safer down there, and I wasn’t allowed to wake my parents up if I was scared.
Image credits: brattykattea
#18
Being told that a boy trying to kiss/touch me in school & making me very uncomfortable/scared was just because he had a crush on me.
Image credits: peteetchou
#19
“Stop crying. Your brothers are just being boys.”.
Image credits: amoodymermaid
#20
Really mild, but my pulse still shoots up whenever I hear my mother walk or breathe heavily, since that’s what she did before what we kids called a “cleaning rampage”, in which she angrily and bitterly cleaned my two little sisters’ messes while blaming me and my big sister for it. I used to dig through the trash to retrieve the things of mine she threw away because she hated “junk” and “I wouldn’t even notice”. I thought I was a bad, messy kid. Nope, turns out she had impossible standards for cleanliness with four little kids running around and she’s so much happier now that she’s accepted she cannot maintain that.
Image credits: LadyCordeliaStuart
#21
Waking up to find my guinea pig gone one morning after I wasn’t able to understand some of her behavior and started complaining. My father likely put her out in the woods and let her become food for a predator. I didn’t say anything because I knew it wouldn’t have mattered to my dad.
Later I always felt such guilt and thought that if I just kept my mouth shut she wouldn’t have had that done to her.
Image credits: Rabbitrules87
#22
Being worried about food and money.
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Image credits: Upstairs_TipToe