If you are a woman with an online presence, you’ve probably gotten unwanted messages from men who are, at best, shooting their shot and at worst, being horrible creeps. If you are a man, perhaps try making a fake account posing as a woman and see how many days, if not hours, it takes for a message similar to the ones here to show up in your inbox.
We’ve gathered some hilarious and, at times, disturbing responses women have given the unsolicited and downright creepy DMs. So get comfortable, prepare yourself for the worst, upvote your favorites and be sure to share your thoughts in the comments below.
#1 I Waited So Long To Post This
Image credits: Nebulabutt
#2 Oh So I Just Don’t Matter In May?!
Image credits: iExorcism
#3 He Stopped Replying After That
Image credits: PM_ME_AMAZON_GC
#4 Seems Like A Stable Guy
Image credits: reddit.com
#5 How To Ruin A Pervert’s “Happy Time”
Image credits: deficientcurfew
#6 Oof
Image credits: kris_5740
#7 Ahh It’s The Good Ol’ “Age Is Just A Number” Quote
Image credits: Destiny-chan
#8 He Unmatched With Me Almost Immediately After
Image credits: CrustyButts132
#9 He Want No Bird
Image credits: Morchel03
#10 Free Advertising For Febreeze At Least?
Image credits: CapnMadski
#11 Guy Is 10 Years Older, And Blocked Me After Reading My Reply. I Clearly Stated In My Profile I Was Looking For People 5 Years Older Maximum, And Nothing Sexual
Image credits: TheTerriblePlace
#12 He Unmatched With Me After This, Can’t Imagine Why
Image credits: toastyghostie
#13 Feel Like This Reply Might Be Of Use To Some Of You On This Sub
Image credits: Anuspilot
#14 Awww He Unmatched Me!
Image credits: missmisery_88
#15 Ice Cold
Image credits: knoerifast13
#16 I’m Dad
Image credits: pseudo_potatoes
#17 I Thought That This Would Be Good Here Too
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#18 Best Way To Deal With Random Creeps!
Image credits: reddit.com
#19 Mans Was Really Panicking
Image credits: Secret_Design1521
#20 I Think He’s Gonna Unmatch Me Soon
Image credits: slaveforfood
#21 Haven’t Talked To You In 10 Years?
Image credits: PenguinsPuffin
#22 He Wanted To Roleplay, So I Did
Image credits: serenityclearwater
#23 I Never Got A Reply
Image credits: MajaLamb
#24 He Never Replied 🙁
Image credits: reddit.com
#25 Smh, Who Wouldn’t Date Shrek?
Image credits: TinyJu
#26 My First Instagram Solicitation!
Image credits: peachmeh
#27 He Might Need To Work A Little On His Comebacks
Image credits: borderline-good
#28 He’s Been Begging For Weeks To Do A “Sexy Roleplay” With Me. I Finally Said Yes. I Think He Regrets Everything Now
Image credits: TheOwlAndTheFinch
#29 This Was The Best Anime Character Arc Of All Time
Image credits: cuckjeet__singh
#30 I Think This Belongs Here Don’t You Think?
Image credits: Nubi_Zara
#31 Ant Farm Blocked Me Right After This
Image credits: monathemantis
#32 Received This On My Art Insta. It Should Be Known I Don’t Draw Mlp, Rule34, Furries, Or Animals Of Any Kind. I Don’t Even Do Commissions
Image credits: -laurenlunatic-
#33 Check Mate
Image credits: throwawaystowaway_69
#34 My Fav Comeback To A Dick Pic
Image credits: B0DY4DAYZ
#35 My New Self Defense Mechanism
Image credits: SaltFetish
#36 This Is How I Handle A Creepy Pm
Image credits: neva-electra
#37 Creepy Unknown Number Texted Me. I Googled It And It’s Been Reported For Being Creepy. I Decide To Scare Them Away Using What I’ve Learned From This Sub (It Worked)
Image credits: reddit.com
#38 At Least He Tried
Image credits: pomplamousse200
#39 Tinders Fun :/
Image credits: reddit.com
#40 It’s A New Color… Perhaps You’ve Heard Of It
Image credits: little-librarian
#41 Sexting Is Easy!
Image credits: reddit.com
#42 Quarantine Has Left Me With No F–king Chill
Image credits: sourest_of_grapes
#43 I Wanna Make A Joke
Image credits: AttilaTheFineHunny
#44 Easy To Say I Was Blocked
Image credits: Who-Broke-It
#45 There’s A Reason The App Only Lets You Message People With Mutual Interest
Image credits: reddit.com
#46 My New Standard Response To Unsolicited Dick Pics
Image credits: OliveOakes
#47 I Was Super Bored And Decided To Try The “Meet New People” Feature Of Kik. Never Again
Image credits: heyhowyoudoin262
#48 Oh No, He Blocked Me 🙁
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#49 Gurl U Crazy
Image credits: monathemantis
#50 Not Into That
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#51 Pretty Sure He Thinks That Tongue Emoji Counts As A Wingman
Image credits: akivavita
#52 Tit Slapper
Image credits: monathemantis
#53 I’ve Discovered The Cure For Horny Dudes And The Asnwer Is Ducks
Image credits: Ihavenotimeforgames_
#54 He Sent A D*ck Pic And Deleted It As Soon As I Made Fun Of It 🥹 Mission Accomplished
Image credits: reddit.com
#55 Aren’t Dating Apps A Lovely Place To Meet Normal, Sane People?
Image credits: lunatoons291
#56 A Friend Received This. She Said The Next Reply Was “LOL Guess Not”
Image credits: reddit.com
#57 What It’s Like On Tinder As A Veterinarian (He Unmatched 😂)
Image credits: mynameisntlucy
#58 He’s Been Sending The Same Message Every Day For A Week Now. Thought I’d Share The Interesting Results Of My Decision To Finally Reply!
Image credits: nineteensickhorses
#59 He Unmatched Me 😂 I Still Prefer A Classy ‘Hello’
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#60 He Unmatched Me 🤷♀️
Image credits: YouGuysNeed2SeeThis
#61 This Is My Favorite Reply I’ve Come Up With For This. I Figure It’s An Analogy They Can Understand
Image credits: Adorable-Novel8295
#62 I Think It’s Pretty Clear What I Have To Do
Image credits: AlwaysSirsAlwaysHer
#63 His Entire Vibe Did A Whole 180
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#64 Out-Creeping The Creeper
Image credits: reddit.com
#65 …and Then I Was Left On Read
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#66 Why I Don’t Date Much Younger Guys
Image credits: sourest_of_grapes
#67 My Charming Old Babysitter Feels Like I Owe Him S*x
Image credits: rixoky