“I’d Lose My Marriage”: 55 Secrets Netizens Can Never Share With Their Family

At the end of the day, every person you have ever met, including yourself, has some secrets that they will simply never share. Life is complicated and there are often times when telling the truth perhaps just is not worth it. 

Someone asked “What’s that one secret you can’t share with your friends or family?” and people from across the internet shared their hidden thoughts. So prepare to take a deep dive into some folk’s only opportunity to vent, upvote the most interesting stories, and leave your own thoughts in the comment sections below. 

#1

I’m learning my wife’s native language as a surprise for our wedding anniversary.

Image credits: ReliantLion

#2

I didn’t “eat at work” I just pretend that I did so my kids don’t feel bad about eating when I’m too broke to afford enough food.

Image credits: Planet_Ziltoidia

#3

I can’t show my mother, the person that inspired/motivated me the most to the creative arts, my work due to it having some LGBT aspects.

For context, we live in a country where gay marriage is still illegal, our highly religious society condems it and violence against it is rampant.

I’ve seen my mom trying to claw her way out of that mindset and went from religious taught raging homophobia to being “just” somewhat uncomfortable with it but generally accepting. But as she grows older the toxic echo chamber grows louder and she is just too tired to keep fighting it. She just keeps her thoughts to herself nowadays.

It makes me really sad I can’t show her how far her encouraging words have taken me, but at this point she just wants to live comfortably. I don’t want her to rock the boat and get harrassed by people around her for showing her support and pride for me.

Image credits: Moonlit0wl

#4

I’m contemplating on disappearing from my husband and family. Everyone in my life has been a negative force and has made me depressed for years. I been saving money for the past 3 years and thinking about leaving a note and getting on a plane and disappearing to another country. I don’t have children so I have nothing for me to stay here for.

Image credits: Rinzata

#5

I’m secretly hoping my grandparents pass soon. One has cancer and the other, dementia. Their quality of life is nonexistent. Both of them can’t take care of themselves. Once they go, there will be so much less stress on my dad and his family.
I’ve never seen my dad truly upset, and I’ve only seen him cry once. I’ve never seen grief affect him, and I’m scared to. He’s always been the “strong” one in my life.

Image credits: beanieballad

#6

That all the invasive medical procedures I had during my childhood made me feel violated and that’s the reason I don’t enjoy any kind of physical contact. Lord only knows how I’ve managed to stay married for so long

Image credits: AdorableAir7418

#7

I started an only fans to pay for my heart surgery when they think I’m just going to get a loan.

Image credits: NegliJade

#8

I am seriously mentally crashing and burning. I have always been considered “the happy” guy. But it was because I chose to be happy and it was a lot of hard work to keep a decent attitude. Over the years more and more gets piled on and you eventually just get tired. I am in my 50s. By all metrics I have it made, but damn if I am just ready to crawl under a rock. It is torture to get through the day. 

Image credits: Caspers_Shadow

#9

How extremely close I am to just leaving everything behind.
Getting in a car and just driving away – boarding the next plane no matter where it goes – just getting on a train and leaving. I think about that daily.

My whole life I kind of waited for things to happen, my current situation is mostly because I almost never take the initiative and do something daring. It’s not that I’m unhappy with my life – it just seems so boring and I feel like I exist more than I actively live.

I have a small amount of money on the side, I know 4 languages and I don’t mind doing s****y jobs to get settled.

Theoretically I could leave right now – but a part of me still thinks I owe my friends and family something and I couldn’t just leave.

Image credits: asdfqwertop

#10

I’ve created a fictional man and woman in my head that I often imagine being. I have even created a family tree for them and a timeline of their lives.

#11

My GF is pregnant and going to keep it. My friends and family are all happy for me, but if i could choose i would not want a child at this time. I love my independance and freedom and it feels like its all being taken away from me.

Image credits: PolarSage

#12

It’s been 20 years and I’d still never tell my mom I took her old Honda Civic out to the pub while she was at work once as a teenager. I’ll probably still get the slipper…

Image credits: PsychoticSnail33

#13

I was a sugar baby, only for about a year, but it helped me move out and be on my own

Image credits: GuideApprehensive103

#14

That I’m a lesbian.

I’ve always, ALWAYS loved girls ever since i was still a kid. Never have i feel something more for the boys back then and men’s nowadays. Even though i live in heteronomative area. I can only imagine myself with a girl, not the other.. So, i came from a Muslim family, and i am a Muslim too.. ( Don’t tell me to leave my religion, for unknown reason my heart feel calm here). Sure, my family is not super religious, but i still don’t think i can come out to them. Big chance they’ll not kick me from the house, but also big chance they’ll be mad at me for several months, they might not accept that their beloved daughter is a lesbian..

Idk, I’m scared.. I know I’m an adult, but still..

Image credits: IWillTellYouWhat

#15

That my dad had an affair when he died. Mom never found out and never will.

Image credits: miss_cutecumber

#16

Mines more on the funny light-hearted side. Years ago my dad got a new mower. My mom was out mowing for him on a really hot day. It should be noted all of us are grown up and out of the house. Anyways my dad came home for lunch and my mom is drenched in sweat and looks miserable and yells to my dad “this mower isn’t self propelled for s**t!” Which my dad shows her she has to pull up on this lever and voila there it goes. We continue to give her some s**t for that to this day.

Well 2 years ago we were getting me and my wifes house ready for our backyard wedding to save $. My dad came down and was helping me get everything up and going including yard work. He mowed using my mower and I was doing other s**t. At the end he said to me “man your mower is a piece of s**t. It doesn’t self propel at all” and I proceeded to show him basically the exact same lever to make it self propelled. He looks at me and goes “OH s**t I did it too! Nobody can ever know until my death bed ok? Especially Jon”. Jon is his best friend.

Image credits: workredditaccount77

#17

that no matter how successful they think i am, i am deeply, deeply, depressed. despite being in a relationship, i am intensly lonely and i hate my life.

#18

That I’m at the end of my tether. I can’t remember the last time I felt any joy or hope. My days kind of just blend into each other.

Employment feels so out of reach. I don’t know how I’ll survive in a couple of years time. I can’t talk to my family about this. They will just scream at me and ask me what is wrong with me.

I just wish I had a reason for my misery.

#19

That I stopped believing in Mormonism 15 years ago. I’d lose my marriage, my kids, and my whole social structure – probably my job. I have to keep going along and make it “look good” or I lose everything.

Image credits: elJovencito

#20

I wish I married my ex instead of my current wife

Image credits: Salty-Ad-2099

#21

I’m the one who called the police on my little brother. Possession, of illegal drugs, and the selling of them to minors the minute I found this out I called the police

Image credits: Ali8ly

#22

I’ve been uploading music on all streaming platforms under anonymously an alias and have amassed over a half million streams in the first year on Spotify alone. Couple hundred thousand on others. I make underground rap / alternative music.

I take judgement very to the heart which is why I have never told any friends or family, but it’s hard making up excuses of what I do with my time.

Luckily we live in such an era where artists can stay anonymous and focus on what they make not who they are supposed to please in their circle.

Image credits: zer0isn0thing

#23

I’m married and have been in a loving polyamorous relationship with another married woman for almost 2 years. My wife is also in a relationship with the same woman and her husband.

Due to ALL of our religious upbringings, if either of our families or social circles found out about what really goes on with our “best friends”, it would be a scandal at best, catastrophic at worst. We all love each other and spend most of our free time with one another but we have to keep a very significant chunk of our lives a closely guarded secret and it’s hard.

Edit: The husband is my best friend but we’re not romantically involved.

#24

That my sister ended her life. My parents are japanese and there is a major stigma around it. Have not been able to tell other family and neighbors. So strange having to lie about something that is on my mind every second of the day!

#25

I’m happy my older brother passed away. Yeah, I do get sad here and there, but he was always in and out of jail my entire life. When he was out, he wasn’t really around as he was chasing the next way to make quick cash. He became a junkie at the age of 38 and OD at the age of 43. Left behind 4 kids as well. Now, I’m not happy he died alone and scared, it’s just that I know where he is now, if that makes sense. There is no more worried phone calls from my mom and his kids asking if he’s back in jail, or where he is. When he was locked up, we really didn’t worry as we knew where he was. I can’t tell my mom that, even though she’s is pain from losing her first child, it just doesn’t hit me the same. I also get bitter towards her for always talking about it and my response is “he’s not suffering, looking for his next fix, and we know where he is now.”

I love my brother and always have. But the weight that’s lifted off my shoulders feels amazing.

I truly do feel for his kids though. They never got a chance to meet the awesome person he was before drugs and crime

Image credits: lillthmoon

#26

My eldest brother, who is over 15 years older than me, is actually my half brother. Aside from my parents, I’m the only one who knows. He’s framed his entire life on the lineage of our father, who adopted him when he was 1 when he married my mother. He’ll never know. He just had a baby this month, a little girl. Dad is already in love with his granddaughter. It’ll be on my shoulders to tell him when my parents pass.

Image credits: randombananapowers

#27

I had to choose my major in Degree under family pressure. I wanted to do something else…

#28

That in this world of tik tok and social media and the internet, I don’t know if my wife and I are raising our kids the right way. I worry that my kids will never be able to make it out on their own and be self sufficient.

#29

That I am a manic depressive person and that I really really have a hard time dealing with anxiety etc. They would just laugh at me and say don’t be a wussy…

#30

I got babtised when I was a baby and my father doesn’t know it.(he’s Muslim)

My mom is Christian and as sh was mad at my father she babtised me as a revenge. I don’t know how to tell my father because I feel really bad about this and I didn’t choose it. He loves me and I know that he wouldn’t be mad at me but I know it could change many things like my father going after my mother.

#31

That I am planning on my dad moving in with me once he is released from prison. My mom can’t find out beforehand she would lose it. Just keep saying ima cross that bridge when I get there

Image credits: Curlyhaired_Wife

#32

That I genuinely don’t love them (my parents specifically). I just feel like there is no reason to owe a life debt to two people just because they brought you to this hellhole of a planet. I should be grateful that I’m here? I didn’t ask for this. It’s your fault that I’m here. You can’t pay for things because you gave yourselves a third person to take care of. Not my choice. You want me to give up my contentment to simp for a metaphysical deity that you believe in only because you were essentially indoctrinated into a legal cult as an easily impressionable child? No. I owe you few thousands of dollars that you don’t even want me to pay back. I can’t tell them this because I don’t like hurting people in general. They did nothing wrong to me, really, that’s just what I feel. I’m sorry if I sound entitled, I’m just adding to this thread.

Image credits: herecomedasheep

#33

I was happier when I was an alcoholic.

#34

I’ve always disliked my sister. She loves me and looks up to me and always wants to talk and be near me but I just don’t like her. It started with things like her telling people she grew up in an affluent part of New York when she did not. Or when my mom took her to get her first car and she took photos with my mom but then went to take photos in front of her friends house because it was nicer and posted those so people would think she lived in a better area. Or when I noticed she never shared holiday photos with our family and only shared holiday photos with her in laws in them. Our mom was poor, she’s missing teeth, she doesn’t look like an elegant older lady from a Cialis commercial, but her MIL does and her sister in law is the typical Christian girl autumn instagram mom type.

She’s embarrassed by her upbringing and by us, and I think she’s a terrible person for it.

#35

I hate my brother in law to the point I can’t be around him. His a sneaky manipulative loser who just uses people while picking up and dropping friends and family when they are useful. The amount of times I’ve had my fiancé crying on me about the latest trash things his done to her and then in the next breath is defending him.

The amount of financial and mental abuse she’s put up from him but because his the golden child the rest of the family won’t hear anything bad about him. So rather then him making him cry in front of everyone and nuking the situation I just stay away and make excuses not to attend family events.

#36

I have two (I’ve only told my wife these two stories): Growing up my father was the manager of a grocery store. He stole from the store – but it was usually cereal for us kids, crackers for the family, and never a lot and never anything the family didn’t **need**. He did it to help us make ends meet. (Yes, it took me until my teen years to realize this). One day my mom took me shopping and be, being a 5 year old during a relatively safe time for a 5 year old to wander around a store unattended (70’s) I was in the bakery and my dad walked up to me and shoved a bunch of muffins in my coat pockets (it was winter, so I had a big winter jacket on). When we got home I started to take them out and my mom started to get mad at me for stealing. I told her that dad had put them in my pockets. She instantly stopped, but I can still tell today she was very angry. When my dad got home my mom sent my sister and I to one of our rooms to play. My parents never fought but there was an argument going. He never had me steal anything again. But, the thought that he would use his child to steal from a store. I’ve always had a disrespect for people who use their children to commit a crime (and yes, it was just some muffins, but still). If you do it your self then you’re putting yourself at risk but if you use your child then not only are you putting them at risk, you’re teaching them a really bad lesson. The second one, my first serious relationship (mid 1990’s, about 2 years long) with the first girl I actually loved. She had a rough home life and was susceptible to bad influences but when she was with me she tried to be a better person (and wanted to be a better person). We were great together but as time progressed things fell apart and we broke up. During one of our post breakup fights she claimed I didn’t know anything about her but I told her I was working with the company I worked for at the time to transfer me to the next state so I could be close to the college she really wanted to go to (and help her be able to afford to go). Instantly the anger in her face disappeared and was replaced with self-disappointment. It was the last time I saw her in person. She called me a couple of years later but I had spent the day deep sea fishing with my GF at that time and I was extremely tired (it was rough seas, even for the north Atlantic). I kinda blew her off and she ended up hanging up on me. If I have the timing right, she took her life roughly 6-8 months later.

#37

That I need a big f*****g hug.

#38

I think my mother helped my dad end his life from a terminal situation.

#39

They think I’m single and celibate only because I want to be. While I’m entirely comfortable with it I opted for celibacy because I have insecurities it would be unfair to project onto a partner.

#40

That one of my friends got really drunk and found my shotgun pumped it and pulled the trigger while pointing at me. I unloaded it that day because I knew we would be drinking. He’s no longer my friend and I’d be dead if I didn’t do that

#41

I will ask them questions about things I have no interest in, because I know they love to talk about it. I’m super bored but won’t show it, and they think I’m a great listener! I

#42

I never liked my MIL. My spouse and his side of the family have no idea, and would be hurt and offended if I admitted that. She passed a long time ago, so there’s no good reason to tell them.

#43

I don’t know if it’s wise to say it here but… well, substances.

#44

That I’m a furry.

#45

I just realized today I have an over the counter pain killer problem. I don’t need to burden my family with the news.

#46

Just how much any of them makes me unhappy. It’s not really one secret since each person hurts me a different way. But I think it’s just my mental illness that’s really making me feel this. Because I irrationally hate everyone.

#47

Number of escorts I’ve been with

#48

An epic sexual history.

#49

I’m gay, I dropped out of college, I’m not interested in dating, I cut my hair, I have mental health issues, I use social media, I run an online store, I enjoy user generated content

#50

I’m not too busy to visit my grandmother before she dies. I hate her and I’ll be happy when she kicks the bucket. I take a lot of joy knowing that I’ll probably never see her again. And when that blessed day comes, I’m not going to the funeral.

#51

I’m asexual.
I’ve tried with my mother but that went nowhere and was upsetting her so I said wow you’re gullible and act differently to keep up the charade.
I have no interest in sex a relationship with either sex I enjoy me myself and I.
Her first response to it how do I know without having a relationship with anyone.
Like how people know what they like gay straight ect.
Porn doesn’t do anything for me.
If I’m horny I just deal with it myself and that’s that.
My father highly religious would reject me so I just keep to myself and enjoy my life.
My mother still tries to get me to meet people I just decline the offer it’s not me and I won’t waste a person’s time knowing my stance it’s not fair to them.

#52

My wife is pregnant. We haven’t had a scan yet so we’re waiting until we know that all is ok and we’re a bit further along

#53

Im an atheist and my whole family is müslim

#54

That I’ve been depressed for years

#55

Nice try Dad! I am onto you.