How parents treat their children has a massive impact on their mental and emotional well-being. Parenting is a huge responsibility. Kids learn from their environments, and eventually, they’ll pass on those same traditions and behaviors they picked up to their own kids, and then they will pass them on to their kids, and… you get the idea. So it falls to parents here and now to take an honest look at what traditions they’re passing on and to adjust them. The goal? To raise healthier, happier, more confident children.
Digital creator Taylor Drayton went viral on the internet after sparking a fun discussion about all the ‘unserious’ generational curses that folks were breaking now that they’re parents themselves. Getting rid of useless food containers is just the tip of the iceberg! Check out the awesome things people shared below.
Bored Panda reached out to the author of the viral post, Taylor ‘That’s Tee’ Drayton, and she was kind enough to share her thoughts on generational curses, parenting, and the importance of compassion and communication. Scroll down for our full interview with Tee, who describes herself as a conscious and gentle parent.
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#1
We take naps…in the middle of day…after doing nothing all day
Image credits: LM Carpenter Sr.
#2
I only answer the phone for certain people when I FEEL like talking
Image credits: musiccitygritty
#3
I admit my faults and apologize to my children when I am wrong
The author of the post, Tee, told Bored Panda via email that she has built up a community of parents who aim to break generational curses. “A lot of the questions I pose to my followers are ones that are seen as ‘taboo.’ I was inspired to ask this question because typically my videos or posts are heavy. I wanted to stay on trend with my content but also lighten it up a bit,” she opened up about the inspiration behind her post.
“While I was unloading the dishwasher one day, I casually began to throw stained Tupperware away. I realized this was something I’ve been doing for years now. Thinking back, my mother and my grandma would never! I always hated using stained bowls for cereal as a kid, so now, I’m ditching them. I love that the post has gotten the traction it has. I’ve had tons of posts on Facebook, TikTok, and Instagram go viral but I knew I was onto something with this post within the first 10 minutes; there were over 100 comments.”
#4
NO STOCKINGS! I will show off my bright white legs and be proud dammit!
Image credits: Stacy Martin
#5
My kid only has to tell me they don’t like something one time. You don’t have to eat it no more. We can find something else. You know how many fruits and vegetables there are, you ain’t gotta like that one
Image credits: jazmynjw
#6
Mental health days! Some days I just don’t have the energy to cook a meal, so I eat popcorn for dinner. And I just don’t have the mental capacity for doing dishes, so they sit there until the next day. I used to get yelled at for dishes in the sink and not eating a proper meal. While I try to take care of my body as best as I can, my mental health definitely inhibits that sometimes, and that’s okay. Also, taking rest days. I’m not doing chores, I’m not working out, I’m not doing homework, I’m just resting and lounging around. I’m sure all of these will change when I have kids, but for now they’re what’s helping me.
The speed at which her post went viral was nothing short of astonishing. “I have a following of over 130k on TikTok and before I could take the post and post it to my account, it had already gone viral. That tickled me. I believe it resonated with so many people because it’s real. I feel as though it opened people’s eyes to the things they are doing differently than their parents and families,” Tee told Bored Panda.
“Often times when breaking generational curses is discussed it’s in reference to education or careers. No one talks about not eating hotdogs and hamburgers on regular sandwich bread. Instead, breaking that tradition and buying hamburger and hot dog buns because no one likes soggy bread.”
#7
We use the “fancy” stuff.
Dishes
Clothes
Whatever.
Every day is special.
Image credits: Caitlyn Sharits
#8
If I’m cold best believe I’m touching that thermostat
Image credits: love_barbiee
#9
Letting children get fun colors in their hair
Image credits: Chan’tial Vasquez
For Tee, conscious parenting (aka gentle parenting) is absolutely key. And its core you’ll find compassion and communication. “In my opinion, when I think of a great parent, I think about one that can flex and flow. Be adaptable. Children/teenagers go through so many phases in their adolescent years and they need a parent that will be supportive and open to them going (flowing) in a different direction than what they would’ve chosen. This is not to say we as parents shouldn’t guide them, but we should foster an environment for them to feel like they have a safe space to make decisions.”
According to the digital creator, some other signs of a great parent include being compassionate, showing empathy, being respectful, and setting boundaries,
#10
I let my son have boundaries because it’s his body and i’m not forcing him to give anyone a kiss, hug or go to anyone no matter the family relationship. he said no then no. he’s 2 btw
#11
Clothes are clothes meaning – I don’t care if they get dirty. Kids are going to outgrow stuff quickly, let them play
Image credits: Jessica Marie Nelson
#12
I’m putting my damn elbows on the table
Image credits: Michelle Diane
“It is my passion to help others create a safe space for their child and to help them better communicate with them. I self-published parent/child shared journals that are available on Amazon earlier this year. This is something my mom and I did when I was a child/teen growing up. We wrote in a notebook and passed it back and forth. It was a great way for me to express myself and ask hard questions,” Tee pitched the idea that some of the parents reading this might want to embrace.
“This truly helped me as a child to communicate and it helped my mom to understand me better. All in all, my goal is to give today’s children the opportunity to say how they truly feel about situations unlike a lot of millennials were able to do growing up. Another generational curse broken!”
#13
We eat dessert whenever we want and we don’t make our son finish his meals
Image credits: Kassidy Renee Little
#14
You don’t have to eat it if you don’t like it, and stop eating when you’re full not when your plate is clean
#15
I actually use the dishwasher
Image credits: Bella Boo
Tee’s Facebook post made huge waves on social media, as well as other corners of the net. The topic she drew attention to resonated with people so much that even TikTok and media outlets picked it up. TikToker Christal Luster’s video which incorporated Tee’s post ended up getting over 716k views and inspired other platform users to make their own clips.
The topic that Tee drew attention to might sound lighthearted on the surface, but it’s actually very serious. It speaks volumes about all the different behaviors that people unknowingly adopt from their parents while growing up, and how they automatically pass those on upon having kids themselves. Some of these might be very healthy. Others… less so.
#16
If I haven’t used something in more than a year, I throw it away
Image credits: Becky Peiffer
#17
If we’re shopping and I pick out something from my kid and they say it’s ugly – it’s ugly, end of the story. We’re not getting it
Image credits: jazmynjw
#18
If my child says she’s not hungry, I don’t make her sit down and eat anyways. She’s learning how to listen to her body
It’s completely normal that different families will have different approaches to parenting. And it’s important to recognize the fact that, so long as nobody is being neglected or abused, it’s fine to raise kids one way or the other. Parenting is a touchy subject, and there’s no one-size-fits-all approach.
However, certain styles of parenting are known to be more effective than others. Case in point, research shows that authoritative parents tend to raise children who are the most self-confident, successful, and self-reliant. Despite the somewhat imposing name, authoritative parents strike a balance between setting and enforcing healthy boundaries and communicating with their kids.
Authoritative parents focus on providing their children with structure and support while maintaining as much transparency as possible. Contrast that with authoritarian parents who don’t explain their reasoning and expect their kids to do what they say, when they say it.
#19
Boys can wear what they want
Dresses? Cool
Lipgloss? Wonderful
Nail polish? AWESOME
Girls DO NOT HAVE TO WEAR SLIPS OR STOCKINGS
Image credits: Jamayca ‘May’ Williams
#20
I allow my children to take personal days off from school. So many times I’ve went to school sick or was being teased relentlessly and I couldn’t do a thing about it. And my babies can wear hoop earrings
Image credits: Apryll Marigny
#21
My son can drink before, during, and after his meal. He does not have to clean his plate
Image credits: Stephanie Marie
Two other well-known parenting styles are permissive and uninvolved parenting. The former is all about giving kids the freedom to do what they want without micromanaging them. The drawback, however, is that there’s often a lack of boundaries and rules. This, in turn, can make it difficult for children raised this way to thrive in more orderly environments as they grow up, like university or work.
Meanwhile, uninvolved parents often neglect any and all responsibilities and leave their kids to fend for themselves. They might be uninterested in parenting or they might simply not have the time to be more involved. In short, children thrive when there’s structure, but not to the point where it becomes suffocating. Too much structure, like too much freedom, can backfire.
#22
I have actual tupperware instead of old margarine containers
Image credits: The Villain
#23
Listen when your kids tell you that they don’t want to go to certain family’s house
#24
I let my kids ask me a million questions and I try to answer them without the “because I said so”
Similarly, kids need emotional support, but not to the point that their parents forbid them from making mistakes. So-called helicopter parents tend to be overbearing, and they restrict their children’s activities far too much and often won’t let them behave like, well, kids. By protecting their kids from any and all possible discomfort, helicopter parents can cause a lot of harm. That’s because their children don’t develop useful life skills like the ability to think and act independently. They also tend to be bad at handling stress and failure.
Fostering positive traditions with your children comes down to spending quality time with them. It doesn’t quite matter what you do, so long as you do it together. So your family traditions can end up being quite fun and quirky. One of the upsides is that you create a sense of predictability and routine in your lives. And it’s often something to look forward to. However, parents ought to remember that they might have to modify these routines and rituals as their kids grow, change, and mature.
#25
If I bought my child clothes and they want to wear them tonight, they can put them on tonight. Have fun, they’re new. Everybody likes new stuff
#26
I don’t save every plastic bag that I bring home. I do not have a bag full of other belled-up bags underneath my kitchen sink or in a drawer. I throw them away or recycle them
Image credits: christalluster
#27
IM NOT KEEPING POTS IN THE OVEN ANYMORE MADRE
Image credits: moonstreetkits
Which of these ‘unserious’ generational curses did you find to be the most witty and weird, dear Pandas? Do you have any bizarre traditions that have been passed down from generation to generation in your family? What kinds of new traditions have you developed at home since you’ve become parents? Drop by the comment section to share your thoughts!
#28
My children are allowed to call me out respectfully. I’m only human and make mistakes and they have their own minds, they don’t have to think and feel the same way I do
#29
Saying I love you to my kids, apologizing to them when I’m wrong, not making them eat food they don’t like, no they don’t have to finish their meals, allowing them to voice their opinions about things they like and don’t like, giving them plenty hugs and kisses and words of encouragement
#30
Whistling in the house my grandma and mum never let me. I whistle inside around them and they still cringe but don’t say nothing
Image credits: Alisa Bertrand
#31
My child does not have to eat all their food. If you’re done you’re done. My parents had pictures of me asleep at the table because they wanted me to finish
Image credits: jazmynjw
#32
I will never keep the plastic on furniture “to keep it nice”.
#33
I let my dogs on the couch and the bed, INSIDE THE HOUSE
#34
I declutter instead of buying more shelves to hold our stuff
Image credits: amandaparker301
#35
Snacking when you are hungry and not shaming others for not waiting until mealtime
#36
we buy BUNS! Not using sandwich bread for burgers, sausages & hotdogs
#37
I let my kids be grumpy / snarky in the mornings.
I’m not nice when I wake up either.
Image credits: Adultish Book Nerd
#38
Washing on Sundays & holidays. I wash whenever I want! No rules here. I also don’t make my bed everyday. The only time I make it up is when I change the linen
#39
Being ok with not having a spotless house all the time
#40
I have hand soap and dish soap… there is a difference
#41
I take the little paper part off the cream cheese spread ….not just peel it back lol
#42
I’m throwing away food packaging like yogurt containers, instead of using them for leftovers. I bought myself glass containers
#43
Not every old towel needs to become a rag
#44
My kids are allowed to rip the wrapping paper on presents!
#45
My daughter can paint her nails red if she likes the color red
Image credits: Diamond Faucette
#46
I throw away Tupperware lids if I can’t find the bottom!
#47
When I get McDonald’s I eat a full meal (cheeseburger, fries and drink)…I don’t drink water and share the fries with my sister
#48
I took my daughter to get her eyebrows done and taught her to shave when she started feeling self conscious. I didn’t teach my kids to be extremely superstitious.
Image credits: Savannah Salgado
#49
Serious, but: My kids are able to have opinions out loud. They are SEEN and HEARD, and I love that for them
#50
I didn’t kick my daughter out when she turned 18. I never made her eat meat if she didn’t want it I never made her finish her food She said the word lie and other curse words but never got in trouble for it Her room is a mess but I didn’t make her clean it (I’m about to start that lol) She wore her hair however she wanted We fine dined all the time She didn’t have to go over relatives house if she didn’t want to No crack of dawn weekend cleaning sessions If I’m up early, I don’t feel like everyone else in the house needs to be up doing something I don’t make up s**t for her to do. She can just “be”
Image credits: Dreama Dickerson
#51
Name brand cereals! I ain’t eating Fruit Whirls or Commander Cruch or Toasted Ohs EVER AGAIN!
#52
I’m not waking up early on Saturdays for NO reason!!
#53
I always have quarters for my kid to get stuff out of the machines at the grocery store
#54
I walk outside in my damn socks to check the mail or put put the trash. if they get stained, I’ll buy new ones with my own money!
#55
Enjoying my Sundays instead of cleaning the house and so what if we got food at home I’m stopping to get me a burger. Oh and letting my clean laundry sit for days Instead of folding my clothes.
#56
We don’t have to use top sheets or make the bed. Feel the soft blankets. They’re awesome
#57
I do NOT use plastic dining utensils nor paper/plastic plates or cups
#58
I buy named brand stuff. And i eat when I’m hungry
Image credits: Staci Cox
#59
I do not keep used grease on my countertop
#60
I allow my child to eat “adult food”. He likes steak and sushi and I don’t try to tell him he has to wait until he is an adult to have them
#61
I don’t store pans in the oven
#62
1. I buy TRASH LINERS for the bathrooms. Scented at that!!! I only use a grocery bag when I run out…
2. I don’t keep ALL the grocery bags.
3. I don’t wash zip lock bags, Solo cups or plastic cutlery for reuse. GET THAT TRASH OUT MY HOUSE!!!!
4. I WEAR MY DISHWASHER OUT!
#63
I’m not saving packets of sauce or ketchup it cannot stay here
#64
I don’t keep sewing notions in a Royal Dansk cookie tin….I have a real sewing kit
#65
I throw boxes and instructions away
#66
We eat at the couch and waste leftovers
#67
If I’m hungry I eat. I don’t care that it’s right before dinner. I’ll let my kid do the same. We will both have an apple before dinner.
#68
There is no such thing as grown folks conversation in my house. If you’re up and you’re in here, we’re talking about it. If they shouldn’t hear it, they should be asleep
#69
My kiddos can wear shorts if it’s hot enough for them to comfortably do so, even if it’s not technically summer
#70
I ask what my kids want for dinner instead of expecting them to eat what I want.
Image credits: Jasmine Nicole
#71
I let my kids sleep ON TOP of their covers (or just with a fitted sheet and blanket.) My dad used to tell me “normal people sleep under the covers.” I always felt like I was weird for it, but I just hated making the bed lol
#72
I don’t yell at my kids if their room is messy. And you know what? Eventually they clean it all on their own
#73
I’m not the we got food at home mom
Image credits: AsiiaRoddii
#74
We jump on the beds and make pillow forts out the sofa cushions
#75
I don’t separate my white clothes from my dark clothes in the wash
#76
If I’m eating out at a restaurant and my eyes are bigger than my stomach, it’s ok if I don’t eat it all and I don’t have to take leftovers home if I don’t want to.
Image credits: Tina Lynaugh
#77
I buy the kids actual pajama sets… we not sleeping in big t-shirts.
If my ATHLETIC daughter inquires, I will let her wear tampons
#78
I refuse to have a junk drawer or use old mail as a dust pan
#79
I don’t let people leave their dishes at my house. You have exactly one day to get your dish or it’s going on the TRASH!!!! All my dishes are white….I know what’s mine! My pet peeve is leaning stacks of random dishes with different designs that don’t go together from various “sets”
#80
Go to a restaurant for dinner after grocery shopping that morning. Yes we have food in the house, but we don’t have sushi
#81
I let my kids bounce basketballs in the house. We have inside balls and outside balls. That’s my only rule on that
#82
Buying my kids clothes that aren’t only on sale. That was huge growing up. I was always teased for having off brand clothes. My kids get whatever they want clothes wise. No matter the price. We save for things that are super expensive and then they get it. I do shop thrifty, but some items we buy full price for quality
#83
I buy new shampoos, conditioners, and body washes before the old ones are finished and just chuck them in the trash